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So, most of you know by now that Chloe has become paralyzed, though however I have neglected to sit down and actually explain to all of you what exactly is going on. On November 2, 2013 Chloe was outside playing with Vixy and injured herself, she was favoring her front and curling her back, though I believed it to be one of her legs or something minor she was put instantly on crate rest and Rimadyl for the pain. Although there didn't seem to be much change at all, she didn't seem to be in pain and was only on one Rimadyl a day, so I went ahead and cut it to half of a pill on November 5 since she seemed to be feeling much better. She was fine the majority of the day, with me working late nights though I don't get home till 10:30-11:30 and am up till 2 or 3 in the morning on a normal basis. That night she was in extreme pain so I immediately gave her the rest of the pill thinking it just hadn't been enough that day. I can't describe the terror I was feeling as my baby girl lay there screaming at the slightest movement of her body, the slightest touch, the softest pat on the head, it all turned her to screams and cries. I sat there with her lying on her side on a pillow, completely powerless, helpless, scared beyond belief. What was I to do? I'm 18 and make 7.50 an hour, I'm already on a constant high stress level and this just pushed me over. Although I do try to pray as much as I can, I sadly do not pray as much as I should. That night however, was different, I begged, choking out words through my tears, wanting nothing more than the God & Goddess to relieve my baby of her pain. However they saw the best for her, just make her stop hurting, anything was better than listening to her wail, it was breaking my heart and I hated to watch her go through it.
I had finally made it to sleep around 6:30-7:00 in the morning, I'd stayed up for hours laying in bed just watching her lay on her side on her pillow in her kennel, crying, and letting out the occasional scream because she was hurting so bad. I knew I needed some sleep or I'd be in no condition to sit down with the vet tomorrow and I wouldn't be thinking straight so I went ahead and took something so I could get some form of rest. I woke up between 8:00-8:15 and for a moment I just lay there watching my girl, she didn't really seem to be moving much, but she wasn't crying, she was just calm, sitting there wagging her tail watching as the other dogs went out to potty, expecting her turn for her crate to be opened. She hadn't noticed I was awake yet, so I lay there for a moment or two just watching her quitely, seeing the excitement and spark that had returned to her eyes once more. So I called her name, "Chloe, what'ya doin' baby girl", wanting with all my heart to see her look at me and then do her spin in her kennel like every morning, to see her up and ready to go. This is almost what I got, except, when she did her spin she only did it with her front end, my eyes instantly tearing up, I knew she wouldn't be able to walk, and so I pulled myself out of bed, sitting down in front of her kennel, opening it, she pulled herself into my lap, wagging her tail and expecting lots of pets, and as I gave them to her I told her things were going to be just fine, that we could do this.
I called the vet right away, and the moment I said the word "paralyzed" for the first time it felt like I'd been hit by an eighteen-wheeler going 100mph. I broke down on the phone with the vet, trying my best to explain what was going on to the receptionist as I choked back as many tears as I could. We set an appointment to be seen at 11 that morning. After getting off the phone with the vet I did my best to piece myself together for the time being for Chloe, I needed to be strong for her, because it isn't fair to put it all on her. I took her out to potty and she just kind of sat there looking at her back legs for a moment or so, I could see the confusion and worry written all over her face, she just simply couldn't understand why she couldn't stand and run. Then it was as if it didn't matter anymore, as if she just shrugged it off like it was no big deal and just went on dragging herself around and getting wherever she needed or wanted to go, and it hurt my heart seeing that she could be strong so easily while I struggled with the smallest sliver of strength that I could conjour up. The days seemed to fly by, each of them a blur, Chloe was healing well, walking again. Yes, she was wobbly, but she was walking and at that point had to be put on a tight leash or she'd run and bounce and spin as much as she could before falling over, and then she'd get up and do it some more, because she was excited, she was happy.
Then on November 23, just over two weeks over her first time being paralyzed, she had a relapse. Things are much worse this time, she had no control over her urination or bowel movement and couldn't even wag her tail. She looked so terribly sad, she just looked down right heartbroken and it killed me. We still haven't had too much improvement, and I'm having a bit of trouble affording all of her vet bills and such but we're working with what we have I guess. She isn't walking at all yet, but she is now able to wag her tail again and is learning to control her bathroom problems again, slowly but surely this time. She is trying to stand, and she's working up the courage, it took her a few days to even want to try and drag herself around, but her spirit is starting to come back. We have an appointment for her to be shaved on December 3 because she stinks from having accidents on herself, and then on December 10 she'll have her first acupuncture session which will hopefully have some form of reaction. We're just going to keep going, keep trying, keep fighting, because this surely isn't the end for us.
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