Thank you for taking the time to read and share in my journey. I know just how very precious time is. 

My name is Shari Haynes. I am a young mother of four wonderful children and grandmama of four precious grandbabies. I have been battling breast cancer since March 18, 2013. In October of 2014 I found out that the breast cancer had metastasized in to my bones. Stage 4, terminal, and incurable. Let's try different treatments and medications in hopes it won't spread until all options are exhausted. I will be fighting the cancer demon for the rest of my life. I am exhausted. I need to find a way to get the rest that I need, pay my medical bills, feed and support my family. I desperately want to live as many years as possible. I want to see my 8yr old son graduate high school and watch my grandbabies grow up. 

Please help. I need your prayers and financial support to keep up the fight. To win the fight. To live.

In March of 2013 I went to the Dr for a disformation in my left breast. His was an expression of immediate alarm. I was hurriedly referred for a mammogram and ultrasound. He then proceeded to gather the entire cancer history of my family. By March 18th I'd had four breast exams, two mammograms, three ultrasounds, and a vacuum-assisted core biopsy. Waiting for the pathology results felt like a lifetime.

At the age of 37 I was diagnosed with stage 3C invasive ductal carcinoma. I had breast cancer. With a prayer in my heart my mind reeled. How could this be? How would I tell my children? I didn't have time for cancer! I had too many important moments that I wanted to be a part of. I had a 6 yr old son who depended on me. He would start kindergarten soon. My grandson would turn one in April. My youngest daughter's graduation ceremony was coming up in May. A granddaughter was due to be born in July. I had just started a new job 6 months prior. I had to stand strong. I had to win. I had to live!

My life and the lives of my family were changed forever that day.

Life became a whirlwind of Dr's, scans, surgeons; all while juggling family, work, and home. During my initial visit with the surgeon another ultrasound was done. This one showed tumor areas in the shape of the devils head with horns. My husband exclaimed “Is that the devil?!” We all stared in surprise. The surgeon replied “Cancer sure is evil. That's for sure.” Surgery was scheduled.

The night before my surgery I was given a spiritual blessing that said I would be surrounded by family members who had already passed supporting me from the other side. On April 1, 2013 I underwent a full left mastectomy. Could it be an April fool’s joke? Please... When I was waking from the anesthesia the first thing I said was “I’m going to kick cancer's ass!” A few minutes later In another waking moment I said that my 2nd great grandmother, Mary Bommeli Eyring, was in the room with us and pointed to where she was standing. A few months earlier I had been overcome with a need to read stories about my ancestors. I was drawn to her story particularly. This was my first realization of just how important genealogy and family history is. It’s so much more than names and dates. It is your family's stories and personalities. They are very real lives that were once lived. If I hadn’t been reading Mary’s histories I would have known a spirit was with me but would not have recognized who she was.

The surgery revealed two larger tumors with tiny tumors independently speckled all around outside the larger tumors. Of 32 lymph nodes removed 20 had tumors. This meant an all too real risk that it could have spread to other lymph nodes throughout my body. Only time would tell.

May 1, 2013 I started chemotherapy. Along with the normal effects (chemo-brain, fatigue, nausea, soreness, taste changes, etc…) I encountered severe rashes, bone aches, neuropathy, and vision changes. I forced myself to keep looking forward. There were times I wanted to just lie down and submit to the discomfort but there was a voice inside me that said “No way! Get up and get moving!” The second and fourth day after a treatment were spent writing, printing, cutting out, and laminating bookmarks with encouraging messages to take to others at my next chemo visit. This kept me occupied from feeling defeated. The third day I was rarely able to lift my head from the pillow. On August 9, 2013 I went in for my last treatment adorned in a rash that even covered my eyelids and numb and tingling hands and feet. The Oncologist presented the choice to skip this last treatment. I knew I needed to do all I could to beat this monster called cancer so I said no way, I’ve come this far, I’m finishing this. Under the Lord’s wing I made it through and rang the bell of completion with great relief. For a moment I could breathe again.

One week later I started my work up visits for radiation. This is done in different stages to determine the depth and measurements for the radiation. You're marked with small permanent tattoo dots placed for reference points. Not exactly what I planned on my first tattoo being. This process spans over multiple visits in three week’s time. On Tuesday September 3, 2013 I began radiation. The treatments were five days a week on my way to work every morning. I experienced weakness, fatigue, and severe burns; the likes of which I’ve never felt before. Because of the severity of the bone soreness I was sent for a full body bone scan. This would help determine if the cancer had moved in to the bone. With much relief it was determined that I had somehow fractured my rib, had stressed the rib joints, and dislocated my collarbone while coughing which then very painfully popped itself back in to place. But I didn't have bone cancer! Or so I thought. Again, under the Lord’s gracious protection I made it through 28 treatments. On October 10, 2013 I received my radiation ‘diploma’. I would irradiate from the inside out for 10 more days then the burns could begin to heal! Yay!

Throughout this journey I have continued to work as many hours as I could possibly handle to support my family. My husband had lost his job in January 2013 and while we desperately needed the income, I more desperately needed someone to take care of me, the kids, the errands, and home. The bills ominously piled up. We fell behind in every way.

I’ve had many misconceptions of how this journey would be. I expected to lose weight during chemo and to not have to shave my legs for the entire summer grasping at every bright side I could find. Unfortunately, the steroids and hormones caused lots of weight gain and the hair loss was not painless or quick. My body hair rebelled for as long as it could and attempted over and over to regrow. The hair on my head did not just fall out. It could be pulled out with your fingers but didn’t want to fall out for some reason. Showering was a horrible mess. Soon it was so uncomfortable that I just took duct tape and rolled it over my head over and over until the hair was removed. But nothing prepared me for the empty way I’d feel when my eyebrows and eyelashes finally fell out, the humiliation I would feel when my fingernails and toenails turned black, the lopsided way I’d feel when trying to dress missing one breast, or the stare of kids and adults alike when I'd go in public.

Four weeks later I started the hormone blocker and could finally begin recovery... I thought.

I was left with constant fatigue and soreness. My arms and hands periodically go numb. I expected that after a few weeks of completing treatment I’d begin to feel better. This was a very unreal expectation. 

I found out last month that the breast cancer has metastasized into my bones. I will now fight cancer for the rest of my earthly days. My right femural neck is almost completely taken over. I have been in a wheelchair ever since because of the high risk of fracture with any weight baring and the severe bone pain. I began radiation again on November 10, 2014. I am scheduled for a partial hip replacement surgery on Wednesday November 26, 2014. I will spend Thanksgiving in the hospital. 

The fatigue is overwhelming. I am exhausted. I NEED to find a way to put some focus on resting and enjoying life before it’s too late. I need your help. I cannot do this alone. I am a survivor but my journey is far from over. 

I truly believe that our experiences are so often about how we respond to them. The people watching our journey and going through it with us learn as much as we do. I want my kids and family to be proud of how I fought and faced this battle. I want them to feel inspired and filled with hope when they face their own troubles in this life. It's so important to extend faith, compassion, caring, and the light of Christ even during times of great hardship.

I have dedicated my life to serving others and caring for my family. It's very hard for me to stop and realize that I have to put some care into myself so that I can continue to be here for my family.

We have two cars in need of major repairs. We do not have reliable transportation. This is especially a hardship when I need to get to and from the Huntsman in Salt Lake City from Springville. I never know if I will make it from point A to point B safely. But they are my family's only means of transportation. Along with the tremendous medical bills we have fallen behind on everyday bills and expenses. My husband is working now and I work as many hours as possible - Missing many hours for Dr appointments and surgeries. But it's just not enough. We cannot do this alone.

To make a donation click the 'Contribute' button. If you would like to help in other ways please send an email to sunshinehaynes@hotmail.com or text 8018504707.
Every little bit helps. All ddonations of any size are appreciated. If you're not able to help financially please take time to lift my family up in prayer. With your help I can live for many more years to come. God bless you!