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BRIEF SUMMARY
My mom had a tough time in the last year of her life. She had delusions that people were trying to hurt her, fell and broke her arm, and was generally in one of the worst times of her (and my) life. The trauma I've experienced during her last year and since she passed has been tough to bear. I have PTSD and sometimes I can't get through the day without flashbacks. I often wake in the middle of the night from nightmares. Thankfully, I have a fantastic therapist and a great support network. However, it has been hard enough to survive this past year, and now on top of all that, I'm looking at being stuck with $20,000 in debt. I've been hiding the past year and giving myself a lot of space to grieve and deal with my PTSD, but now it's time for me to come out of my shell to ask for support and take another step in healing from the past two years. I really need outside help from my family and friends in order to stop drowning in debt and interest payments. If 40 people gave $500 I would be back to zero! Of course every little bit helps tho! Thank you for any and all support, I truly appreciate it!
THE NITTY GRITTY:
THE COST OF BEING POOR
Since my mother’s health crisis began in summer of 2021 and her sudden passing in May of 2022 I have racked up $12,000 in credit card debt. When my mom’s health emergency began I had already spent years paying off a predatory car loan (over $10,000 extra in interest) –the best I could get even though my mom co-signed–and the $5000 debt I racked up the last time I helped her 5 years ago when she fell and had a medical emergency. I had just managed to get my credit to a good place by paying off the debt incurred helping her the first time, and switching my car loan to a reasonable APR, then this last emergency episode started happening.
DETAILED ACCOUNT: In fall of 2021 my 72 year old mother suddenly no longer had the mental capacities to care for herself. She was having paranoid hallucinations that people were trying to hurt her every night. Being her only child, I made several trips to figure out what was going on, and ultimately brought her from her trailer in Phoenix, Arizona to my studio apartment in Oakland, CA. Doctors were unable to figure out what was causing her mental health to deteriorate–which was alarming and scary in of itself–but on top of it all her paranoid fears were keeping both of us up at night. I had to take a lot of time off from work to care for her while she was living with me in my studio apartment, which quickly became untenable for a working class person without any family wealth. After spending six weeks and what I now know would be the last holidays with me, she went to Florida to be with her sister. Eventually she was placed in an elderly care facility because her care needs were too severe for family to keep up with. We were still trying to get her an MRI to see any physical issues with her brain, and deal with a chronic UTI which alone can have an elderly person go crazy. Between the medical system being so broken and her being so uncooperative, these basic things were never even dealt with. Several weeks after arriving at the facility she suddenly died from medical neglect because they gave her incorrect drugs whereby she became bedridden which then led to bed sores that then turned into the sepsis that killed her. The care facility was found guilty of wrongful death by an internal investigation, and we will hopefully be bringing further legal action against them in the future. However, until then…..
WHY THE ASK: Over the last year I have paid $5,000 in interest payments alone on my credit card debt and had expected to receive some portion of the $12,000 that was in my mother’s bank account/estate at the time of her passing. I am doing this fundraiser because probate took a year ( make a will! ) and now that it's finished I have been notified that I won’t be receiving a penny of the $12,000. I have felt utterly defeated since hearing this news because I was hoping to receive a little financial reprieve after going through a year of financial and emotional devastation. Also, I have big life changing plans I’ve been working on for many years, including moving across the country in September, and this credit card debt is threatening to postpone plans that have already been delayed a year since my mother’s passing.
WHAT THE MONEY WILL HELP WITH : First and foremost I want to pay down my credit card debt so I can return to having good credit again ( $12,000) . Secondly, I want to stop paying for my mother’s storage unit in Arizona and go with a friend to retrieve some family photo albums etc. and repair and register my mother’s car ( $3000 ). Had I not already paid the $5,000 in interest I would have that money to finish my undergraduate degree to then be able to then start my Masters in Environmental Studies; additionally, I started medically transitioning last year ( a life long plan to pass as a woman) and plan on having a trans related surgery early next year, so part of the funds raised will go to my recovery from surgery and help me in my cross country move ( $5000 ).
TOTAL ASK: $20,000
Thanks for reading,
Spira Leena
SPIRA WHO? She is a trans-tastic gardener, plant-whisperer , herbalist, former activist who shifted their focus to community care in the last decade. Spira always lets friends (and they have a lot!!) crash on their couch–even since moving into their studio apartment. Spira is committed to community support like doing weekly laundry for a disabled community member, post surgery support for their trans sister, and generally sharing what resources they have. Irrespective of the many things and traits that Spira offers us all, Spira, like everyone else, deserves to be able to take time to grieve and process such a tragic loss. Giving to this fundraiser will help Spira move forward and continue to heal.
-tere
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