TS Taylor Ann Houben Needs Your Help
$280 raised
1% of $25k goal
4 contributors
35 Weeks running
My name is Taylor Ann Houben, a trans woman starting transition.

We all have our lives to live and the illusions we create, on our way to our realities, and sometimes, they require the vision of others to become actualized...

Hello! I'm Taylor Ann Houben, a mature individual that came to the conclusion that she has been lying to herself for too many years. I grew-up in the upper Midwest, surrounded by judgmental bigots that force everyone to their way of thinking. If someone was gay or transgender, they were chastised and expected to change their ways or face certain damnation.

As a result of "coming out," I lost everything, and I mean everything, and have struggled to exist. "...but I will survive, and I will overcome," that bigotry, back "home," continues to exist as well. Here I am and I know who I am...a beautiful, motivated trans-woman that is really to take on the world. I see my world through feminine eyes, I cry with a feminine heart, and have desires that can only come from a sensual, feminine spirit that is putting herself into the universe and re-emerging the person she was meant to be.

I need your help. My first $22,500 was stolen from me, by someone I should not have trusted. So now, I'm being smarter, and using this crowdfunding site to protect your donations and well-wishes.

The whole process is going to cost me about $66,000, for what I need done. To make things happen quicker, I am going to break it down into thirds-FFS, BODY SCULPTING AND BREASTS, AND SRS. I'm scared about all of this at times, but I know I will come out just fine "...with a little from my friends." (Paul McCartney)

Why?


What really defines a woman vs a man? Feminine attributes include sensitivity to aesthetics, appreciation of detail, deeply developed empathy and kindness to others, OPEN affections, a certain type of strength-pragmatic and compassionate, graceful, and most compelling of all, a willingness to show vulnerability. As a male, I didn't see myself as being any of these traits. I had to be self-centered, selfish, machismo, and not be too concerned about things going on behind the scenes. Wrestle the world to the ground and stomp on it...but as a person with a feminine spirit began to emerge, I embraced all of these things and more. Relationships, building a home, and being a true partner in life and in the bed began to matter more than the guys and beer.

People are more than just the sum of their parts, and to be honest, that is what drives me deeply into loving myself beyond today's understanding, and hoping for a new tomorrow. I want to be vulnerable to someone that loves me for who I really am...it's more of than just sex that drives a woman; it's being alive, in control of herself, and using her gifts to build the life she desires, with or without a cock. Yes, someone can be a woman with a cock, but I choose to eventually donate it to science...I understand what it is to be a woman but haven't yet allowed myself to be totally emersed in it's splendor. In some ways, being transgender and being a naturally-born woman are much alike. You have the same prejudices and obstacles and when some people find out that you no longer buy into the crap they have been shoveling your direction for year, they do everything possible to block your path.

So why do I want these surgeries? The true person I am needs to come-out and live her life. Why should you care if I started out as an ego-centered male? It's about where I am now and who I will be to you. I am totally astonished on how many women feel threatened by someone like me because we choose to join them, not beat them.I have no pretensious agenda other than to share in the intimacy that most men will never figure out, and...maybe do a video or two for posterity.

I AM TRAPPED IN THE WRONG BODY but it is the realization that I have BEEN LIVING THE WRONG LIFE for so long, that makes me move forward at this point; I CANNOT GO BACK to the person that was...only forward to embrace the future.

A Very Sad Day...

During my journey, the Pulse Nightclub killings occurred. It has taken me the longest time to really express my feelings about the people that were taken from us and how it affected me. I do have this to say...they were living their lives, despite the judgemments of others. Watching that day unfold, I saw several religious and societal bigots point their fingers and cast the 'blame and sin' upon those that were expressing the true person within, to their peers.

I have to ask...Which is a greater sin? Lying to the world about who and what you are...or being honest and true to all those that matter to you? One's self? Family? Friends? I didn't shun them... "Judge not lest you be judged..." is found in my Bible.

The biggest thing that impacted me from Pulse was that you absolutely need to be true to yourself, in all that you do, whether it is work, play, relationships, or just looking in the mirror and asking life-changing questions. The only person I fear is the one looking at me, in the mirror, and she is asking why I can't let her be free. I learned that I need to be free as myself,and through the life I live, honor those that have lost their lives being honest with themselves and the world.

"Through your lives and deaths, I have learned to cry for someone other than myself."

Daniel Whitmarsh

Friends, acquaintances, and those of you that I do not know yet, I need your help. I am being a little selfish in saying that the life you save may be mine, but it is the truth. Not that I am thinking of killing myself because I AM NOT, but the life that I am being forced to live is a lie in itself. It's not me. The real me is trapped inside this shell and cries every day to get out and live. She is sensual and attactive but more than that, she is a woman that will leave her mark on the world. Please donate and feel that you have done a good thing.

 

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