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From hell and back-help me get on track!
kr3,138 raised
5 contributors
28 Weeks running
I´m Annika, a 41 year young Swedish woman. Having spent a big part of my life in total chaos, last year I hit rock bottom. I lost everything, but I found myself! Now I want to explore my creativity and highlight urgent social issues-will you help me?

My name is Annika, I live in Sweden and I've been around for 41 years.

My life has been a battlefield since day 1.

Growing up with abusive, violent and alcoholic parents and moving around alot set a solid foundation of severe dysfunctionality. I remember depression, anxiety and panic attacks since an early age. Throughout my life I have struggled with mental health issues, addictions and fucked up relationships.

Almost 9 years ago I was blessed with a son, the most beautiful creature I have ever known and I made a decision to heal at the very core of my being. I went about it with every inch of strength and determination I could possibly summon comitted to find a way out of the anguish of my own existence. I tried it all; the 12-steps program, NLP, meditation, rawfood, exercise and breathingwork. I´d get up early in the morning to sing mantras for an hour. I used affirmations and every single trick I could find.

For a few years I went at it so hard and together with the daily responsibilities of earning a living and being a mom, I crashed into a severe burn-out and depression which eventually made me relapse into old addictions and patterns.

Early last year I hit rock bottom and found myself homeless, broke and alone. I experienced betrayal beyond what I even thought was humanly possible. I was traumatized and broke down in so many different ways and on so many different levels it exceeded my capacity of understanding. Having been diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder and Bipolar,  I was used to having regular episodes of depression and hypomania. The Borderline part was a certain receipt for disastrous relationships. And they all came crashing down on me at the same time. A nightmare on steroids tailormade to tear me apart.

In October I managed to get a trailer, I moved in and with a minimum budget I redecorated and painted and got somewhat of an ambient atmosphere. This was a big breakthrough as I could build up consistency and trust with my kid again. His permanent home is with his father, who kept the place when we split up. But our trailer is our sacred little spot.

I want to turn this around completely and start making a compelling future for myself! I want to, no I NEED to find new ways to express myself or I'll suffocate. I want to do something I have never done before. I want to make rapmusic and highlight urgent social issues the way I understand them.

I need YOUR help to get to the next step. Help me raise the money I need. I will use it to pay rent and basic living expenses and initial startup-costs like a computer and online coaching (to help me strategize and break it down to manageable steps) microphone, headphones and minor unforeseen expenses. That way I can take some time off from my regular job and focus primarely on this project. If I manage to raise the whole amount, I will be ok for 3 months.

PLEASE forward this to your friends and make a contribution TODAY

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