A BROTHER’S PROMISE

In December 2024, I lost my elder brother to suicide.
There is no way to fully describe what that does to a family and a community. The shock. The questions. The ache that sits in your chest. The waves of grief that come out of nowhere. The “if only” thoughts. The moments you forget for half a second… and then remember again. Our world changed, and we are still living with that devastation.
I’m sharing this because I can’t stay quiet anymore—and because I don’t want another family to feel this pain if something practical, local, and immediate could have helped sooner.

This is A BROTHER’S PROMISE.

The problem we’re facing in Hawke’s Bay
Across Wairoa, Napier, Hastings, and Central Hawke’s Bay, we have services available—but I know personally that engaging with services is rarely happening when it matters most.
Not because people don’t need help. Not because they don’t deserve help.
But because referral pathways can be hard, processing times can be slow, accessibility can be limited, and for many people the biggest barrier is this: reaching out can feel like you’re risking your dignity—your mana—at the exact moment you’re already struggling.
And when someone finally does reach out, we can’t afford for the response to be: “Fill in the form. Wait. Try again.”
Because too often, people don’t try again.
What people will do.

In our communities, when someone is struggling with grief or suicidal thoughts, many will bypass the system altogether and go to someone they trust:
A local face. A coach. A neighbour. A workmate. A kuia. A community leader. Someone they know will keep their mana intact, have mana-enhancing conversations, stay engaged, and feel safe to talk to.
Those people already exist all around us. They’re already carrying the calls, the messages, the late-night check-ins.

What they need is to be properly trained, resourced, and supported—so the help they offer is safe, consistent, and sustainable.

Our plan: 20 Local Champions across Hawke’s Bay
We are fundraising for 20 local champions across Wairoa, Napier, Hastings, and Central Hawke’s Bay—trusted people with lived experience, strong local connections, and the willingness to show up any time of day or night.

This is not about replacing professional services. This is about closing the gap between:
• the moment someone finally reaches out, and
• someone being there—immediately, safely, and with skill.

Fundraising goal: $60,000 – $80,000

That’s approximately $3,000–$4,000 per champion to cover training and support, including:
• ASIST (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training)
• safeTALK (Tell, Ask, Listen, Keep Safe)
• Youth Mental Health First Aid (YMHFA)
• Professional supervision 
• Resource packs (practical tools for real moments)
• Ongoing learning through free online training, plus engagement at local community events.

What your donation does

Your donation helps build a trained network of trusted locals who can:
• recognise when someone is at risk
• ask the hard questions safely
• help someone stay safe in the moment
• stay connected beyond the first conversation
• and support people to engage with wider services when they’re ready
This is community-led, mana-protecting, life-affirming support—right where people already turn.

How you can help

If you can donate, thank you. Any amount helps.
If you can’t donate right now, please share this page. Visibility matters—because the more people who know about A BROTHER’S PROMISE, the stronger this safety net becomes.

From my family’s loss, I’m choosing to build something that protects other families & communities. Thank you.

From love with hope.