Tristen Jerome 02-09-11 – 09-29-12
My speech at my T-Mans Funeral October 5th, 2012 Vigil Services
I never would have thought that I would have to do this. Who does? How does one prepare? You don’t. All week I knew I wanted to come and speak and I knew if I didn’t I would regret it. I’m honestly pretty numb. I keep thinking He will wake from his nap and I will give him his snack.
We had a plan, the plan was for him to get up and play with his green play-doh that he received from his very 1st Birthday party that he attended. I was going to give him his milk and he could have some pizza with us.
I once heard and I am sure many of you have heard this but “live for the day because tomorrow may never come.” Wow is this true, my day came but his did not. I can tell you without a shadow of doubt my lil man lived for the day. He got up happy as can be! He played with bubbles and had a chocolate chip pancake. He danced with us. We went to his first birthday party and his last meal was chocolate cake and ice-cream. He literally celebrated his last day. As we went to go put him down for his nap I saw four horses on the trail in front of our house. I yelled at Cooper (my husband) and said grabbed Tristen quick so he can see this. This was his first time seeing horses. He also came right back inside without a fight. This rarely happens. He truly lived for the day! When Tristen was headed up for bed he gave each of us a kiss. Tristen was never the kissy or cuddly type of baby so I definitely took that. He even gave his Sister Isabella 2 kisses and held onto his daddy to bring him to his bed. Tristen knew this was his last day, he knew I would need that kiss, he knew that his dad needed that hug and kiss, and he knew Sister needed two of them. Tristen knew he we going to be with his heavenly Daddy. I wish he would have told me.
When Tristen was 1 month old I can remember telling a lady that I cannot wait for him to be like 2 so we could play together. Or I couldn’t wait until he could feed himself, I cannot wait to see him walk…. She then looked at me and gave me the best advice ever. She said don’t wish this, live for every moment. Be excited that you can just hold him and kiss him. Live for and be excited for every milestone of his life, because it just goes by too quickly. Because they grow up and all you want is for them to be a baby again that you can just hold and kiss all you’d like. I am glad I listened to her. I did this I enjoy each and every day of his life. Yes it was hard but I wasn’t afraid to whip out the paint to allow him to paint because it might get the floor messy. I didn’t hesitate at all to allow him to put the egg in the bucket to make muffins because he might miss and make a mess. I am so thankful that allowed him to do these things. I do not have any regrets.
Yes I do wish that I could see him grow up and go to his first day of Kindergarten, that I could see him go to his first sporting event. Yes, I wish that I could see him have his first crush. But you know what? All of these things come with hurts. Having a broken heart because your boyfriend/girlfriend broke up with you. Your friends are teasing you because you do not have the right brand name of shoes. You know those pains we have all had them. Being teased on the playground because you may not know how to throw the ball right. As we grow up the pain and stress of coming up with money for the next bill. We all have hurt in this room. But my lil T never hurt. He truly passed without any hurts.
We would love to build a natural playground in memory of our beautiful Tristen. Will you consider helping donate in his honor. Thank You.