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Are you a Name or a Voice?
My pastor started his Sunday message with this question during the season when I was seeking the Lord for my future direction. My Fulbright adventure in the US was coming to an end and I was going to continue pursuing research through a PhD track. But this question stirred things in my heart that I had never thought of before. The question God asked me was why I am in Academia. Is it only because I love research and the beautiful people I meet there? Or because it is my calling? Am I doing it because every degree, every scholarship, every published article adds something to my name, or because I am given a chance to be a witness for Christ in a place where so few know His name? Do I want to be a Name or a Voice?
Through these questions God was sifting my heart and showing me the dark corners where pride and fear were nesting, and at the same time revealing His heart for me. This is when I got an oportunity to take a year off from Academia to study at the Oxford Center for Christian Apologetics (OCCA), which I believe is the best possible step I could make in this season of life. It would provide the time and the environment for the re-shaping of my heart and mind to form me into a better witness – seeking His glory in everything I do. I want to see the Lord in ways I have never seen Him before. I am thirsty to receive fresh revelation that would allow me to express His Wonder and Beauty in deeper ways, because of the wisdom and training I would gain at OCCA.
There is one Jewish proverb I particularly like. It asks, “What is truer than truth?” The answer is – a story. The story of God does not end on the pages of the Bible – it continues. We often mistake ourselves for the main characters in His story, but the truth is that He is the Author and the Main Character in everyone’s life. And the greatest possible honour that I can imagine – is to be one of the voices, sharing His story, and giving all the glory to His Name.
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