Thank you everybody. Our campaign is now over.
Help Chase Even a Slight Chance of Love!!
$20 raised
0% of $10k goal
1 contributor
0 days left
Ended Oct 15, 2013
I’m asking everyone out there that as ever felt love to help!  Are you one of those lucky persons that have met your soul mate?  Have you lost love and wondered “why did I let that person go”?  Have you been left and secretly wished ...

For the first time I am reaching out to people for help! I’m reaching out to everyone out there that as ever been blessed with feeling of true love in their lives.  Are you one of those lucky persons that have met your soul mate?  Have you lost love and wondered “why did I let that person go”?  Have you been left and secretly wished that the other person tried a little harder, fought a little more, or that he/she just once put you first… number 1!  I know it’s a long story but please read till the end.

                Here is my very long story as short as I can tell it.  Three years ago I met what I didn’t realize at the time is the love of my life.  We stared out causally flirting and that blossomed into a love I could not have never imagined.  With my love growing stronger and stronger for this new love I always struggled with being away from my kids in Virginia.  The time came where I had to choose between love and my kids (at this time they were too young to fly and was not able to visit in CA).  Being a good father (I thought so) I choose to leave this woman behind and move cross country.  I thought this was the end of something special.  Boy was I wrong! I couldn’t let go of her!  Not in my thoughts, in my heart, or even in my dreams.  She had always stood by me and said she would always love me and if I ever was ready to come home to her she would be waiting with open arms.  So I found myself in Virginia, alone and missing this wonderful girl.  I called her almost every day till one day I not could handle it anymore and I reach out for her.  I told her I needed her.  I needed her here with me.  There was no real hesitation… she gave up everything.  She was working two jobs and put in her notices, packs her stuff into her small four door car and set off for a 3000 road trip.  What an incredible sacrifice this young, beautiful, amazing woman would do.

                Ok.  Fast forward a little down the road.  We struggled in life here in VA.  Even with typical relationship struggles we manage to build a home.  We have two mastiff dogs that have always seen in our hearts and our eyes as our two fur babies.  She loves them like a mother would love her children. She did everything possible for our “kids” and me.  During this time in our life I started going through some hard times with other things going on in life, however she continued to stick my side even when she disagreed with what I may have been doing.  Almost 2 years into our lives I ask this incredible woman to be my wife.  With an answer of yes… she made me happier than I ever thought possible.  She had gone from my flirt, to my girlfriend, and then to my fiancée. 

                Life should be wonderful right?  I had a wonderful woman in my life, I had a “happy home” with my kids in town, and two wonderful dogs to share with my soon to be wife. Well now it’s time for my life to take a turn and crash!  I have not mentioned this until now, but I’m an alcoholic.  I was too stupid to know or come to the realization I was an alcoholic till my life imploded.  You see… this incredible woman that I found was trying her hardest to help me and support me but I was to stupid figure it out. Without fail I would drink every day.  She would “bitch” every day and I would lash out.  I would constantly tell the woman I love “I am who I am; I was like this this before you and I’ll be like this when you’re gone; if you don’t like it leave!”  Somehow I forgot the sacrifice and the love she blessed me with and brought to our home .  So after 2 ½ years of hearing “just get out if you don’t like it” she did just that.  She called her family and got a one way plane ticket back home.   To make things even sadder she didn’t get a plane ticket for the next day… no, not even the next couple of weeks.  She got one for almost 1 ½ months later (I never thought about the fact she might have been giving me a last chance to get my head out of my ass).

                So my thoughts where….. “Ok.... let her leave.  Who cares!  I’ll just drink the pain away.  It’s always worked before.  I’ll move on and who needs her! “I drank my life away to try to get rid of the pain and the heart break of losing her.  When I hit my bottom I was lying on the floor and my pistol was on the table (it was secure in the bedroom the night before and I have clue how it came out to the table).  I was alone and without my “rock” that I had been leaning on for over three years. 

                This is where I am today.  I put the bottle down, I go to AA every day and I have asked the lord to come into my heart.  I’ve asked him to walk beside me and show me guidance and support when I may stubble in life.  Every waking moment I miss my best friend.  Every heartbeat I feel empty and miss her love.  By all means I am not on a soap box saying I’ve been cured and I found god.  I however am trying harder than I have ever tried before.  Hoping one day I can show the woman that I love that she is worth the world. I want to show her that while I forgot somehow along the bumpy road that she deserved the world and to be placed on the highest pedestal, I’m working on getting back to the man she once fell so deeply in love with.

                Ok, so what’s the plan?  I’m not going to lose my best friend!  I might have lost my girlfriend and my fiancée, but there is no chance I am I going to lose my best friend.  The fact is that I’m stuck here in VA.  I have a three bedroom apt that is furnished and I have two 150+ pound mastiffs.  I can’t just act like a 21 year old and pack my stuff up and run off to California.  I understand that if you have read this far… you most likely think I’m crazy as hell.  I kind of am…. But I’m the crazy in love type.  I’m not moving everything I have across country thinking I’m just going to show up and win my fiancée back.   I however need to be close to my best friend… just if she stumbles and she needs me.  In case she needs a person to call, a shoulder to cry on, and friend to talk to. I need to be that 10 min drive away….not 3000 miles and a $700 plane ticket.  I want to win the right back to be the solid rock she leaned on for so many years.  This is something I am not able to do being this far away.  I can only hope that someday she can see I am the man that she once fell so deep in love with.  I want the chance to show her she is worth someone giving up and sacrificing everything for.  So, PLEASE open your hearts and wallets and help me get back home where I can be closer to my soul mate.  Maybe, just maybe I can regain my best friend, the love of my life, and one can only dream one day… my wife.

                If you have ever felt true love, believed you may have lost true love because there was no sacrifice, or just wished a guy/gal would give up everything and be crazy in love with you; PLEASE find it in your heart to donate and help me get home. 

Anything you can spare is that much closer to my heart.  Thank you. 

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