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I want a motherfuckin sailboat and I need money to buy one. It will bring valuable life lessons to my kids and bring our family closer together...plus it's just something I want really really bad that I don't have!
We have a roof over our head, my family has food to eat, but we desperately need a sailboat that can safely sail to South America or Hawaii, at least a 50' one.
So if you can find it in your heart to donate some money to my sailboat fund, even just $5, I will be very appreciative (sounding to you, but what you won't hear is me bitching about how cheap you are to my family for only donating $5)!
Our goal is only $300k. If everyone just threw down $100, it would only take 3000 people to realize my dream!!! If you have it in your heart to donate $100,000 or more, I might even consider taking you on a cruise in it to show my appreciation!
If you just give us the ideal sailboat, a cruise is guarenteed!
I've already tried convincing my friends into buying things they don't really need for a lot more than they're worth, but that was too hard and I didn't get rich like I was promised!
I was told all I have to do is have parties at peoples houses, but if I'm doing a party, I'm getting fucked up, so that didn't work out too well!!!! Needless to say, I've puked all over "Product" of many types. I have learned valuable lessons though. Plastic containers and cookery hold up to vomit much better than makeup!!!
I didn't even get a awesome free vacation bonus that I was told was so easy to acquire :(.
So here I am pleading...PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE share this request to everyone you know, because I want this sailboat REALLY REALLY bad!!!
Thanks so much for taking a moment to read this and give me free money to fund my dream. Enabling me to enjoy a pimped out sailboat will bring my family much joy, be ideal for raising my kids, and will bring your family great karma!!!!
Because I am so motivated to get free money, I've made it very easy for you :).
PS...If you share this and it gets 1,000,000 likes, you will find the love of your life, never get scammed on facebook again, and lots of sick kids will immediately get better, and I'll know when your birthday is!
Much Love!
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