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Hi y'all! If you're on this page you probably know me - I'm Sugar, and I yell about sexuality, gender, dating, mental health, poverty, sex work, and activism on the internet. I've been a part of my community of writers, educators, activists, and sex workers for 8 years.
I've also been spending this entire calendar year trying to bounce back from homelessness with my Nesting Partner (NP), and now my homeless girlfriend has joined us. My homeless-i-versary is December 3rd, and right now I'm trying to raise money to get us a new apartment so that I don't spend another December on the streets in the Pacific Northwest!
Please help us meet our fundraising goal - the amount is intended to account for first + last month's rent, deposit, and the cost of a small Uhaul to transport our modest assemblage of Goodwill furniture from our room. If we can't pay for a place in time, we may also end up using some of the fundraising money to get a motel room.
If you're unable to donate money, unused gift cards and hotel points can also help us at this point! Unfortunately we won't have an address to receive packages long enough to receive anything from wishlists. Send me a Twitter DM or an email if you can help us out this way!
What Happened?
My roommate got a wonderful opportunity to move somewhere else,
so at the end of October, one of my girlfriends who was homeless in GA
moved in with us so that we'd be able to afford to stay in our
apartment. Then we found out that without our household having enough
people employed for us to earn 1.5x the rent, we couldn't stay here.
The job hunt began.
Right now my girlfriend and nesting partner are still in the process of getting jobs in the area. I've been working since September, but it is part time and minimum wage, and even on part-time hours, it takes a massive toll on my body and my ability to earn money consistently through other avenues due to my fibromyalgia and mental illnesses, to say nothing of managing my partner's medical care, as well as my own, and our household.
Please help us raise enough money to move us into another home within a week - even if my partners get employed tomorrow, no one is getting paid soon enough for us to get a place. None of us want to sleep outside again, and all 3 of us have done it in the past.
We are two enbies and a trans woman just trying to get back on our feet from homelessness in spite of capitalist oppression and the difficulty it adds to the situation with our disabilities, neurodivergence, and chronic illnesses.
We're aiming to raise first + last month's rent and a deposit based on average costs in the area, but if I don't have enough for us to find a place by next Friday, we'll have to start delving into the fund to pay for a motel room of some sort.
My Story
If you haven't followed my trials and tribulations, here's a highlight reel:
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In Fall 2017, I fled an abusive home situation in NC to come live with a friend in WA.
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In Fall 2018, my living situation in WA was becoming increasingly isolating and dangerous for my PTSD, and I needed to find a new place to live.
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I went to an inpatient behavioral health hospital at the end of October, and when I found out I would need to find a new home, I ended back up there again at the end of November. The hospital planned to set me up with a monthlong crisis shelter program, but on the day of my discharge, they were full - instead, I was given the address of a women's emergency shelter I could sleep in at night, and released onto the streets. I had no one else in the Sound area who could let me couch crash, as my partner was already living in their car at the time.
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My partner and I spent all of December homeless, using their car for a little privacy and shelter whenever they weren't working. My Twitter, blogging, and real-life friends were kind enough to support us by sending us money we could spend to hang out indoors, and use to buy warm clothes, food, and other essentials. I wrote a bit about the experience, when I could go to the library, in some posts on Medium called The Homeless Diaries.
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In January, a kind friend and her partner let us crash in their guest room for a few months while we tried to figure out what to do next. With more help from the community, we raised funds to purchase a renovated RV, my partner further renovated it to make it livable, and we planned to drive it down to Reno, where another partner and their family were going to help us get back on our feet again.
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When we finally finished renovating the RV in April, we discovered the engine overheated quickly - we could only drive about 1-3 hours, inhaling fumes, before the RV would just die. Fortunately we were on our way down to Portland to visit my pal Piph, and she was gracious enough to host us for a week while we tried to get the RV fixed, as well as put out feelers to find us a couch to crash on.
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Fixing the RV was a fool's errand, and while we couch-crashed with some kind friends in Salem, we realized that we needed a break from crash-fundraising, so we could both get on Medicaid and access the medical care we sorely needed.
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The friends we were staying with connected us with our current roommate, the one who is moving out at the end of Nov, and we've struggled to pay our part of the rent and pay for life in general ever since we moved in.
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My NP has spent months largely unable to work because of health issues that they're in treatment for, and despite constant pain, I'm trying my best at my job and picking up as many hours as I can whenever possible. I'm hoping I can get connected with mental health care here in the near future so I can better attend to moneymaking opportunities online in addition to my retail job. (In reality, mental health care probably won't get to happen until January when my Medicaid provider changes. :( )
- When our roommate announced she'd be leaving at the end of Nov, my GF and I began saving to bring her up to be our third roommate, so she could have a home again, and we could keep the one we've just started getting comfortable in.
- Between broken hearing aids, PTSD and anxiety overwhelm, and chronic physical pain, my partners haven't had much luck in their job hunt as they hoped. Now we need help so we don't have to sleep outside again! Salem already has a large population of homeless people, and I am not prepared to be homeless again. I'm emotionally incapable of handling the constant physical pain and the lack of privacy and safety I experienced while I was homeless last year.
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